Professor Spot


I can’t do the dishes unless iDJ is home, too. This is because when I would get home first I would immediately try to do some cleaning up. The sound of rattling silverware became a cue that ‘daddy’ would be home soon, and Spot would start in with the caterwauling. So I wait, now, to save me from murdering his little furry ass.

He finds other things to get over-excited about, however. The church is close enough to us that the 6pm Angelus bells are very audible. ‘Daddy’ also gets out of work at 6. Both Spot and Neko get a bit crazy and a lot annoying when the bells start to chime; they know when the bells are about to play, too, and get wound up in anticipation. I hate hate hate this behaviour.

But I’m helpless. No matter what I say and how many times I repeat it, I have never been able to convince hubby that this excitement is bad. Bad for me, bad for him, and bad for the furry kids. I’m totally ignored: every day when he comes home he greets Spot and Neko at the door and gives them tons of attention, and then feeds the cats their special wet food after giving them massive love and affection – as they SCREAM THEIR HEADS OFF for both. And the dog bounces around the house, and drools, and whines, and brings innumerable toys to him, and then also gets a food treat.

Makes me want to vomit.

Nevertheless, I think at least some of my long experience and expertise with animals (that has now become constant bitching) has rubbed off on himself. He noticed tonight that Spot is trying to train him to do a new trick.

This is Spot, sitting in the sink after I’ve finally managed to do the damn dishes. Or as many as I can because the damn dish drainer fills up before I’m done – hence all the crap still sitting around my sink. Anyhoo, Spot did this for the first time ever last night. I was not in the room. I got to hear about it in detail, however, as iDJ narrates everything. Everything.

“Hey, Spottie, whatcha doing? Whatcha doing in the sink? Hey, hon, guess where Spotty is? He’s sitting in the sink! Awww, how cute is that? Hey Spottie! What do you want, buddy? You want me to turn the water on for ya? Do you want a drink? Here you go, Spottie-Pants! Now, I need to put my headphones back on, so I won’t hear you when you’re done… Hon, he’s drinking from the tap! Awwww, how cute is that? I love it when he drinks from the tap!” (giggling sounds more suited to a 4-year-old)

Tonight, Spot got in the sink again. And right away hubby realised he was being trained! And told me so in great detail. Of course.

As he turned the tap on.

Who, me? Bwah ha ha ha haaaa!

18 responses »

  1. Hahah! Chloe seems to have specific things that set her off too…namely, J*’s nap or bedtime, especially if we happen to walk outside right after we put her down. It’s like she’s saying “Where did everyone go? Come back!” But I can’t very well not put the baby to bed. She also seems more vocal in the PM, and if we here her off in another room caterwauling, there’s a high chance she has knocked something onto the floor to play with (pen, electric socket covers) and for some reason feels inclined to be loud about it. LOL

    • PS, my hubs “narrates” too, but in a different way. He seems to feel that all his stories that he tells need EXTENSIVE background details, I mean, heavy on the minutiae. Sometimes, it’s almost embarrassing. LOL. I’m like, “Dude, it really doesn’t matter if so-and-so said this on Tuesday or Wednesday, the end result is the same! Move on!” Hahah

      • Hahaha, I’m glad to hear this isn’t a thing only women do. In my experience, this focus on minutiae in storytelling comes primarily from the women in my family (ugh ugh ugh get to the point!!!), whereas the men tend to be more direct.

        People complain when I tell stories, because my stories often include as little detail as possible. Sometimes to the point where there isn’t even a story, and my friends have to prompt me to figure out what I’m even trying to say.

        “One time…this person…”

        “You mean our friend X we saw last week?

        “Yeah, that’s the one!”

          • That was awesome, that thing he did! I go overboard trying to describe who I’m talking about, as I can NOT remember names. Just did it yesterday – “hey hon, what’s crazy-man’s name again? The one who lives in our estate? Yeah, him. The guards were just at his house….”

            • That’s not too bad… It would have been worse if… “You know, the gray hair, he has that earring in his right ear…or is it his left? No, it’s definitely in his right ear… And he drives a dark Buick…green…maybe black…” Like you’re giving a description to the cops of a murder suspect. LOL

        • I live in a country known worldwide for long, involved, barely-truthful storytelling! My mom was a writer, so she could go on a bit, too, but it was never boring. And I have to apologise to you, I changed my email address for the blog and lost all of my daily emailed updates! I will rectify that now for your blog, I hope there’s some new comics!

  2. Aww, Bengals and water. Miss Nickel drinks from the tap too, and is fascinated with the shower, though when I pull back the curtain she books. And yeah. Loud.

    That first picture is priceless.

    • I caught him in the sink later on, hence the pic. I only got the two shots before he started asking me for water. I said, “get down,” and he did. Sigh. How come the cats can train a human but I can’t?

  3. My cat started doing this in kittenhood (complete with some d’awwww pictures of her curled in the sink with my bare thighs behind her visible in the mirror that later surfaced on facebook…oops) and it was sooooo cute I just couldn’t resist.

    But now when she does this, she doesn’t quite fit in the sink. So I turn on the tap to soak her and tell her to get out but her fur is so long and thick it takes a couple seconds before she even feels it.

    She got to the point where she practically wouldn’t drink water unless it was moving first. Such a princess.

    • Hahaha, I soooo want to see that picture! I saw much worse on someone’s eBay product photo – she forgot any kind of pants or undies. Hey, at least she wasn’t all scary 70’s porno furry.
      Yes, they do love the running water, don’t they? Spot does it goofy, he soaks his foot and licks it off. They do say Bengals don’t mind water…

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